Goodbye, Cape Town.
I wish I could attempt to put into words many things. Such as, how hard of a goodbye it was to this incredible city; to my 3 month experience living and interning here, departing from the culture, and the people and places that filled it. Or how deeply I am changed and impacted; how my passion for life has grown in a significant and life-changing way. Or how meaningful the people I’ve meet here are to me; the special friendships I gained that blessed me and grew me in ways I didn’t expect.
The more experiences in life I’ve had that mold me, shape me, and change me, the more I’ve come to realized the truth that experiences such as these can never fully be described in words. Although tempting to let this ineptness of words unfold into bitterness towards those unable to understand or relate, what I’ve also come to realize is this: there is a beauty that lies in the inability to convey life’s greatest experiences, challenges, and triumphs into a form fully understood by others. Perhaps, it is the greatest condition to be in when life has transformed you so greatly that, regardless of words written, pictures shared, or stories told, there is only one who fully knowns the extent of impact, the depth of growth, and the force of power of these collective moments – that person being you.
By far, this was one of (if not the) most stretching, challenging, rewarding, and fulfilling experiences of my life. I realized weaknesses and strengths of mine I would not have seen had I not been stretched in the ways I was. I’ve gained insight into who I am – developed skills, realized passions, & rekindled desires and dreams of mine. I am filled with excitement not only because of the incredible journey I’ve just walked, but also because of the new confidence inside me that my life will continue to be painted with experiences like this one; ones that are amazing, hard, crazy, transformative, stretching, satisfying – ones that act as a powerful force of change in who you are.
At the beginning of my time in Cape Town, I assumed a foolish thought: that after 3 months of living abroad, I would leave feeling satisfied, perhaps even “settled down” by attaining something I’ve always desired so deeply. As much as I’m thrilled by my time here, the opposite occurred – I’m leaving only hungry for more. The great thing is, that’s exactly how life should be. Never an end to the opportunities and dreams and people and experiences that make life the adventure that it is. My perspective in this sense was deeply impacted by those I met who live this out consistently, not questioning “what if” and “should I” when it comes to stepping outside of personal comfort in order to reach new heights. Their lives, their stories, their dreams, their hearts – it has stirred me to grab hold hold of the dreams and longings deep inside. Pursue them, with confidence and knowledge that, first, your ultimate fulfillment will not be found in these things alone, but that, second, they surely will bring about a deep growth, transformation, and fulfillment inside you.
So, to the city that showed me how to be fully alive, to love life, embracing all it has to offer, thank you. You have changed and pushed me in a ways I did not expect, but am deeply and forever thankful for.
To the people who impacted my perspective on life, who showed me what’s possible, and to pursue that which enriches and awakens you to the beauty and excitement of life, thank you. I see greatness and purpose in each of you.
To St. Michael’s, the girls I built special and challenging relationships with, and the staff and everyone I worked with, thank you. You made each day worthwhile, and exemplified true perseverance and commitment. I truly believe in each of you, and hope and pray the absolute best for your lives.
To the places I’ve seen that felt as if they took my breath away, thank you. You showed me how beautiful this earth is, how magnificent the Creator is, and stirred me to ponder the beginning of times when it all came to be.
To the days that were so incredible I never wanted them to slip away, to the moments that filled me with amazement and wonder and joy, thank you. I’ll never forget the feeling of genuine fascination these moments brought me.
To the not so good moments, the ones filled with worry and anxiety, fear and uneasiness; the ones that made me feel incapable, overwhelmed, alone, and unequipped, thank you. You taught me that I am much more than the emotions I feel and the lies in my head of what I cannot do. I am stronger and more confident than before because of you.
To the people and environments that made me feel unsafe, uneasy, and fearful, reminding me of what could wrong and the worst that could happen, thank you. You’ve shown me it’s not worth it to live life in the “what ifs” and fear of harm, even in the moments where it seems acceptable or logical to do so.
To the people I was far away from but who loved me, supported me, encouraged me, and listened when I needed an ear, never writing me off in the moments I felt somewhat insane or like I was falling apart, thank you. You’ve shown me the genuine blessing and power of community by each of you being in my life.
To the spots that became “my places,” to the people that filled them with familiar and friendly faces, thank you. From go-to coffee shops to after-work afternoon snack spots, you helped Cape Town become home, providing me with spaces to think, to process, to refocus.
To this great adventure, this life-changing experience, this great city, and all its people, places, and memories that have filled me with hope, inspiration, a new excitement for life, a yearning to learn, a longing to go, an appreciation for discomfort and unconventional ways, thank you. You’ve done far more in me than a short blog post could ever explain.
Until next time, Cape Town, thank you.
Kendall, a junior Political Science major, spent the fall 2017 semester studying in South Africa through CISabroad.
Kendall is also a recipient of our Office of Study Abroad Scholarship.
Read more from Katie at https://kendallbrannon.wordpress.com/Don't miss your opportunity to study or intern abroad! Start your search at http://studyabroad.uark.edu/search/
